Thursday, August 23, 2012

Robo Taco

Robo Taco is located in the Buckman neighborhood at 607 SE Morrison.

I was on the fence about this place. I read some rather mixed reviews, most of the positive ones mentioning the kitschy atmosphere (robot decor), late night hours, and vegan menu. This did not bode well for the food itself. None the less, I gave it a shot. It had been a long time since I'd tried a new place and written a new review. So, here I am!

I'm sorry it's been ages since my last post! It's not that I haven't been eating burritos, heaven forbid, I've just been eating at my typical burrito joints. The summertime makes me lazy, with a hankering for bbq and sandwiches. But I know as the weather cools, my extreme passion for burritos will re-emerge. It never ceases, but with rain comes melancholy, and with melancholy comes a longing to fill the void with ENORMOUS JUICY BURRITOS.


Al Pastor Burrito

Ingredients:  Pinto beans, rice, cheese, salsa, sour cream, al pastor (marinated pork shoulder), and... pineapple

Price: $7.25

Sides: 3 salsas

Size: Big

I didn't actually think they would put pineapple in my burrito. The menu said that the Al Pastor tacos were topped with pineapple, but the concept of pineapple in my burrito was entirely infeasible. Upon first bite, however, I got a big mouthful of... you guessed it... pineapple! A bit of a shocker, but I carried on. I kept biting and chewing and trying to taste anything but pineapple. About halfway through the burrito, the pineapple died out. I was happy to taste something else, however, no other flavors emerged. I thought my taste buds were broken! I took a bite and held it in my mouth, sucked on the meat, anything I could do to try and get some spice out of this bastard! My tongue picked up a slight burnt flavor but that's about all I could decipher. I drenched it in salsa (also devoid of piquancy) to add to its edibility. The meat was chewy and overcooked. The pineapple was blasphemous. It was overwhelmingly bland. BLAND BLAND BLAND. I shouldn't have to try so hard to taste my food. Even if it were 3 am and I was a drunken hipster, this wouldn't have been good. But I suppose robots don't have taste buds, now do they?

The Rating:

1/2 star out of 5.

Will I go here again? No.

 Robot says: "ROBO TACO IS A ROBO NO-GO"